June 1, 2000 -- You have often heard the phrase, "preaching to the choir." Too often, documentary viewers are members of the "choir." Documentaries dealing with controversial social issues should be seen by not just the uninformed, but also the unconverted.

"Our House: A Very Real Documentary About Kids of Gay and Lesbian Parents" is a documentary for all of us, but particularly those with strong opposition to homosexuality. This 1-hour film lets us observe an aspect of gay life that we just don't give much consideration to. It's called family life, having and raising kids, families eating dinner together, fishing trips, coping with being a teenager. You get the idea. And over two million gay and lesbian parents are doing just that with an estimated three to five million children.

Meema Spadola, the child of a gay parent, has produced and directed a very straightforward documentary with no gimmicks, no sensationalism, and no melodrama.

Five very different and diverse families are the focus. This film is mostly about children, children nine to 23-years-old; Latino, African American, and white; various religions including Mormons; country and city kids; kids in New York, New Jersey, Arkansas, and Arizona.

In each family, the children are asked about their feelings towards their parent's sexuality. For most of them, it is just no big deal and they would just as soon people stop asking them about it. They are much more concerned about their education, their personal dreams, and being themselves.

The film examines one male couple and three female couples, and one formally heterosexual couple, now divorced. Some couples have adopted children, while others have conceived children through donor insemination. As you would expect, these families endure harsh and mean-spirited reactions by individuals within their schools and communities.

One family finds support through a gay gospel church; another turns to home schooling for their child. Nonetheless, the families go on with normal, daily routines, working, fixing meals, caring for and nourishing their children. The production values of this documentary are not that of a polished filmmaker. The lighting is sometimes quite bright, giving the documentary a video rather than a film look.

It also appears that the producer incorporates home video footage, mostly likely shot by family members. There is no narration, only the off camera questions by Spadola. However, the film's subject matter offers us the opportunity to examine the ideas of what it means to be a family.

The program is only different because you and I don't ordinarily get the chance to see inside the homes of gay and lesbian families. Perhaps someday, this rare view will be quite normal and not worthy of a documentary subject matter. But for now, it is the beginning and the continuing effort to inform a larger public.

I hope those who really need to see this film watch it on Wyoming Public TV on June 6th at 10 p.m.

Click here for links to places to buy this movie in video and/or DVD format, the soundtrack, books, even used videos, games and lots of other stuff. I suggest you shop at least two of these places before buying anything. Prices seem to vary continuously. For more information on this film, click on this link to The Internet Movie Database. Type in the name of the movie in the search box and press enter. You will be able to find background information on the film, the actors, and links to much more information.

E-mail Mike McElreath at mmcealrea@luwyo.edu