(2008) Exactly. Why would anyone other than Hollywood-types care about this movie? Twice divorced ($30,000 a month in alimony and child support alone to the second wife) with a teenage daughter and two young children, Ben (Robert De Niro), frequently communicating with his people via his Blue Tooth or cellphone, is a powerful Hollywood producer at the test screening ("I needed this to work") of his latest movie, Fiercely, starring Sean Penn. But the previews are "Terrifying."

At the conclusion, Penn's shot, and after rolling down a declivity, a white dog comes over to him as the bad guys stand poised to shoot him again, but first the dog gets a bullet in the head. Having final say on the film (since she has responsibility for the picture's multimillion-dollar funding), studio executive Lou Tarnow (Catherine Keener) wants the ending changed (threatening to re-cut it herself), in order to reduce her expected loss on its release, which in the artistic view of British director/writer Jeremy Brunell (Michael Wincott) would eviscerate the film, sending him into a paroxysm of table pounding. After nearly a year of sobriety, Jeremy turns to alcohol and drugs.

On the front page of Variety is a report of producer Jack Macdonagh's suicide (blew out his brains). Based on screenwriter Art Linson's book, What Just Happened?: Bitter Hollywood Tales from the Front Line, director Barry Levinson's picture tediously traces the trials and tribulations (Monday through Friday in and around Costa Mesa, southern California, and then a week later in Cannes) of a Hollywood movie-making man. (Wanna know what a movie producer does? Then here's an entertainment for you.)

A year and a half after the divorce, Ben, unable to get over his feelings for Kelly (Robin Wright Penn), gets her into bed (interrupted by an important phone call from an actor), finds another man's argyle sock under the bed, and attends counseling sessions, the purpose of which, says the female therapist, is for their "never going to want to get back together." Ben suspects Scott Solomon (Stanley Tucci), a married man, of having been in his former conjugal quarters. A young female graduate of Stanford seduces Ben.

With a new project about to begin filming, Ben needs the leading man, Bruce Willis, to shave his six-months growth of beard, the thought of which (loss of artistic integrity) enrages the actor into a fit of furniture destruction. But if Willis persists, the execs have threatened to shut down the set and sue both Bruce and Ben for breach of contract; Ben demands that Willis's agent Dick Bell (John Turturro) communicate the consequences of remaining obstinate to his mercurial client.

On Thursday Ben attends Jack's funeral where Bruce eulogizes the man, quoting from Hunter S. Thompson; surprisingly to Ben his 17-year-old daughter Zoë, displaying emotion, is there as well; he also confronts Scott about the argyle sock. Somehow the movie manages to continue on life support, but by the end it's a dead dog.

I can't even say I loved the music. The purpose of this review (if not already abundantly clear) is to discourage you from ever wanting to watch this movie.

Click here for links to places to buy or rent this movie in video and/or DVD format, or to buy the soundtrack, posters, books, even used videos, games, electronics and lots of other stuff. I suggest you shop at least two of these places before buying anything. Prices seem to vary continuously. For more information on this film, click on this link to The Internet Movie Database. Type in the name of the movie in the search box and press enter. You will be able to find background information on the film, the actors, and links to much more information.

Copyright © 2008 Patrick Ivers. All rights reserved.
Reproduced with the permission of the copyright holder.

Patrick Ivers can be reached via e-mail at .