(1932; b/w) The oft-imitated, comic filmmaker Ernst Lubitsch's film begins in Venice, moves largely to Paris, but ends in the back seat of a taxi. In the rearview mirror I can see the start of it all, the Baron preparing to meet the Countess, saying to his servant that beginnings are always difficult: Romeo or Casanova meets Juliet, or is she Cleopatra? Begin with cocktails, advises the valet; make sure the moonlight is in the champagne, reminds the Baron.

Meanwhile, Monsieur François Filiba (Edward Everett Horton) reports to the police having been robbed while a doctor was examining his tonsils. Back in the Baron's room as he and the Countess are dining, she recognizes him for what he is - "You are a crook" - while he sees through her false front: "You are a thief." He shakes her down to recover his pocketbook; he returns her brooch (with its one good gem); she hands back his watch, re-regulated; he shows her the garter he has nabbed but refuses to give it back.

The urbane Gaston Monescu (Herbert Marshall) - a Frenchman announces over the air that the international thief has recently stolen everything at the Peace Conference except for the peace - and his blonde pickpocket accomplice Lily (Miriam Hopkins) relocate to Paris.

With two suitors, the Major (Charlie Ruggles) and Monsieur Filiba, vying for her affections, the heir to her late husband's perfume company, Madame Mariette Colet (Kay Francis), a beautiful brunet, expresses her state of mind: "Marriage is a beautiful mistake which two people make together." At the opera her expensive (125,000 francs) new diamond-studded purse disappears, only to show up in the hands of Monsieur La Valle, who returns the item for the advertised reward of 20,000 francs. (Before he does, a young Trotskyite chides her for spending so much on a handbag during such times of hardship for the average person.) Confessing his own reversal of fortune with the stock-market and banking crash, La Valle apologizes for needing her reward. Impressed with La Valle, Madame Colet hires him to be her secretary.

La Valle/Monescu brings in Mademoiselle Vautier (aka Lily) with a plan to rob the safe: cash only, insists Gaston to Lily, who has her eye on a pearl necklace. But Lily soon realizes that Mariette has begun to covet her man, to which Gaston assures her: "As far as I'm concerned her whole sex appeal is in that safe."

Suspicious of the new secretary, Monsieur Giron (C. Aubrey Smith), chairman of the board of directors of Colet Company, advises Madame Colet, reminding her of his 40 years of association with the family, to be more careful with her confidences. Hoping for more time (a transfer of a large amount of cash to the safe), Gaston senses the walls closing in - Monsieur Fibila has seen him - and sends Lily to Berlin by train to wait for him; but Mariette comes on strong: "I wouldn't hesitate one instant to ruin your reputation." Giron uncovers Monescu's identity, but Gaston recognizes a fellow crook when he sees one.

Lily returns to grab the money from the safe for herself: "What does she got that I haven't got?" Still unaware of Monescu's motives, Mariette enters Gaston's room - "When a lady takes her jewels off in a gentleman's room, where does she put them?" - where he finally admits: "I came here to rob you, but unfortunately I fell in love with you." So who will it be, Lily or Mariette? Gaston bid farewell: "It could have been marvelous." "Divine," she agrees.

In Hollywood today a satisfying ending has become difficult, Lubitsch had one so good that it was later imitated in Walter Hill's 48 Hrs. with Eddie Murphy and Nick Nolte.

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Copyright © 2008 Patrick Ivers. All rights reserved.
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