(2005) For the BBC's TV series, "Shakespeare Retold," Sally Wainwright has shrewdly re-imagined Shakespeare's classic play (keeping the story and hilarity but rewriting the dialogue from Elizabethan to modern English), for David Richards's direction, with a Member of Parliament, vying for leadership of the opposition party, Katherine Minola (Shirley Henderson) - a 38-year-old, multimillionaire virgin - as a nasty gorgon ("the bitch from the Black Lagoon"), a monstrous tyrant with a tempestuous temper ("Everyone thinks she's a dyke or Hitler"), spitting venom by the vats in spats with each and everyone she meets (even turning over the table in a restaurant with her mother and sister).

While she's sure that she can frighten voters into voting for her, her adviser suggests marriage as a softening touch to her harsh exterior (having "a face that could turn milk sour").

Returning from Italy, Katherine's gorgeous, fashion-model sister Bianca (Jaime Murray), arranges for a handsome 19-year-old, Lucentio, to accompany her on the flight home. In her apartment when she attempts to dismiss her manager of 12 years, preferring Lucentio as her companion (to teach her Italian), Harry (Stephen Tompkinson), who has been secretly nursing the hope that his loyalty would eventually win her heart, responds: "You're not going to get rid of me." Bianca retorts: "I'll get married when Katherine gets married." In the meanwhile, she asks Lucentio how to say "I want you to make my pip squeak" in the tongue of Tuscany.

Into Harry's despondency bursts Petruchio (Rufus Sewell), his best mate, having been kicked out of Australia for not having a work permit and in need of money (following his father's demise) to save the family manor of 15 or 16 generations. Would a wealthy wife do, even if she were ugly and as horrible as Medusa?

On their way to Bianca's party, Petruchio and Harry watch as Katherine sprints away, sparks flying, from the festivities toward the elevator; the man from down under pursues her into the lift where they get trapped together, he gets aroused by her infuriation at his attempt at seduction ("plucky, fun, exciting"), and he proposes: "I like everything about you."

After a visit to his childhood home, where Petruchio lets fall that he's a gentleman with a title, the 16th Earl of Charlbury, Kate (as he calls her) agrees to their marrying; but on the day of the wedding, the eccentric aristocrat, throwing off his formal attire, says to Harry: "There are things about me she needs to know." Arriving with Bianca in a white Rolls (irritated with her groom's tardiness), Katherine is appalled at Petuchio's turning up on a motorcycle "pissed, dressed like a money's ass."

In high heels, net stockings, a kilt, open blouse, makeup, and cloak, Petruchio (himself tight) grips Katherine tightly as she glares and snarls at him all the way down the aisle (her side full while Harry alone sits on the left) to the altar. Before taking a flight to Italy for their honeymoon in a villa for a week (all the while Katherine threatening a divorce), Petruchio invites Harry (whom Bianca has informed she's engaged to Lucentio) to join the newlyweds: "I'm going to tame the bitch."

The unstable exhibitionist, after making sure they are stranded (deflating all the tyres of their vehicle), tells his bride he intends to "rip your knickers off and have sex with you." With Harry's arrival, food and luggage appear. "All you have to be is nice to me," says Petruchio, swinging her suitcase toward the swimming pool - but this will be a contest of wills as Kate replies: "I don't wear knickers, anyway, not when I'm on holiday."

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Copyright © 2010 Patrick Ivers. All rights reserved.
Reproduced with the permission of the copyright holder.

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