(2010, English and Urdu) The shoe-bomber, the underpants-bomber, the Times Square bomber, and various others tried and failed in their missions to blow up people and create havoc fortunately because of their ineptitude at making or setting off explosives. Viewed from director Christopher Morris's perspective, we should respond with hilarity rather than horror at their clumsiness (forgetting to take the keys to the getaway car), their misplaced trust in their leaders (who never seek martyrdom for themselves), the silliness of their ideology (72 virgins or maybe just a bowl of white grapes waiting for them in paradise) as in his black comedy of five (and then there were four, three, …) British jihadists. These guys are the four stooges of Islamofascism.

Sitting at home with his wife Sophia and young son, Omar (Riz Ahmed), the smart one with a security job, shows them outtakes and bloopers of videos (Waj holds a weapon deemed to be too small: "Proper replica, man") the wannabe terrorists recorded of themselves.

Contacted to participate in a training camp in Pakistan, Omar and Waj (Kayvan Novak) argue with the Pakistanis over the direction to face for prayer, hide from a drone attack, further upset their trainer by using a video-cellphone (the Americans can detect such devices) to take pictures, before being ordered to go back home: "A curse on both your fathers!" But before they depart - Waj asks if it's God's will is it also God's fault - the pair manage to destroy with a rocket launcher the hideout of Osama bin Laden.

Back in the UK with Barry (Nigel Lindsay) - who has ignored Omar's imprecation, "if you try to set up the Islamic State of Tinsley again, going to university lectures, opening your big mouth, buying some more silver nitrate from Amazon ... I'm gonna rip your plugs out!" - Faisal (Adeel Akhtar), and Hassan (Arsher Ali), they argue over Barry's choice - to radicalize moderate Muslims - of a mosque for their target. "You can't win an argument by just being right," insists Barry.

In an experiment with explosives, a bird gets strapped with a bomb: "You go to heaven, brother crow." When the car once again malfunctions, Barry, responsible for maintenance and repairs, deflects blame: "It's the parts - they're Jewish." Faisal becomes the first fatality, a martyr to mutton. (In the end credits we're told: "One sheep was blown up in the making of this film.)

Omar assures Waj that while he may ask him to blow himself up, he'd never demand his pissing into his own mouth. Eventually settling on detonating themselves in costumes during the marathon race, Waj once again gets rattled - "I think I'm confused, but I'm not sure!" with his heart's saying not to do it while his brain's all for it - and asks for Omar, who has just told him to go with his heart, for guidance: your brain's disguised as your heart.

Nevertheless, the British authorities - "We know a lot more than we think we do" - have difficulties in preventing the suicide bombers from reaching their goal. Screenplay by four lions: Christopher Morris, Jesse Armstrong, Sam Bain, and Simon Blackwell.

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Copyright © 2010 Patrick Ivers. All rights reserved.
Reproduced with the permission of the copyright holder.

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